Monday, July 07, 2008

Traces of memories...

I have a cousin who I used to look up to because of his cool character and his achievements in life. He's one of those few who has it all. Great job, good salary, a happy family...everything. And lucky me, I was his favourite cousin.

Although he's much older than me, but still, since I was a kid, we always managed to have great and fun conversations. He's like the brother I never had. He makes it a point to drop by at my house everytime he went back to see his family. And the fact that my mom took care of him when he was a kid, makes our bond a lot more stronger.

When I was 19, he once told me;

You know, if anyone told you that you are special, just take that as a compliment and move on. Jangan cepat bangga diri and jadi megah. Sebab the truth is, we are nothing compared to the billions of stars and planets that God created around us. Bukan maknanya you can't feel good about yourself. It's just by thinking of it that way, you'll keep your feet on the ground.

I don't really understand what he meant when he said that. But I just smiled and nodded as if I understand every word he said. I looked at him, and I knew his train of thoughts is just making circles in his brain.

As time passes by, we kind of lost contact with each other. I didn't keep in touch with him and neither did he. What I heard from my mom, is he had a string of bad luck. Lost his job, problems with his marriage and all sorts of bad thing that you could think of. I felt sorry for him when I heard that, so I decided to give him a call, just to see how he was doing.

I'm ok lah. Sapa suruh call?

Mana ada sapa-sapa suruh call. Saja call, tanya khabar.


Look, I'm sorry if it's a bad time...

No lah..hey, ingat tak last time, when I told you about that special and stars thing tak?


Masa tu, ko tak paham pun what I'm trying to say right?

Lebih kuranglah. But now I do.

It's good that you remembered. Because I forgot about that. And look what happened to me.

No lah...jangan cakap macam tu. Everyone has their ups and downs.

It's true you know..? And you know what makes me more sad....? That's the best advice anyone has ever given to me. I preached it to everyone I know. And I blew it because I forgot about it. You know who gave me that advice tak?


Your dad. He's a good man. I really look up to him. He's the only one that believed in me besides your mom, and I let him down.

Don't look at it that way lah... One day, you'll get back on your feet and you'll be just fine.



You know what, you sounded just like him. That's good. The world needs more people like you and him.

I'm thankful enough if I turn out to be half the man my dad was. To be described in the same league as he is, that's an honour.

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